WA Over 45's - 2014 Match Reports

WA vs VIC - Friday, October 3, 2014

First game of the tournament and the first time that the entire team has been together, dressed, fired up and ready to go, including Squizzy with his taped over shirt from a late recall into the team, Chiso who has just recovered from man flu (?Ebola), Beaz who had recovered from Hawthorn’s AFL victory BBQ, Mano who was not anaesthetising anyone today and Eric who turned up sporting the hair cut of week with his head proudly shaved with a #2 displaying “WA 45s”. Goalkeepers! Do you have any tattoos? Fortunately, Lucky Phil the physio was on hand to rub some vigour into the remaining squad. 

By their own admission the Vics were a newly formed unit whose only training game had been a flogging by their own O35s . The weather was a warm 23 degrees which favoured us. Suck correctly described the first ten minutes as a train wreck of jitters and poor disposals but sensationally interrupted by the new kid on the block, Westie, slotting in the first goal just inside the right post at the 14 minute mark. Umpires conferred after Vic protests because of some prior indiscretion but as we all know, if they did not see it, it did not happen, there is no video referral and it’s a goal. 

We continued to gel and were unlucky to not have Wildy or Simmo pot another one. The short corner battery was unable to convert two chances but then our defence remained steadfast when it was our turn to defend. Half time 1-0 up and a welcome but brief break. 

We came out stronger in the second half with better running, marking in front and anticipation. Chiso held his tongue, intercepted a poor pass and broke straight for the keeper. We held our breath waiting for the crack shot into the roof only for Chiso to take the smart option, laid off to Macca on his left, who tapped in for our second goal. 

After that we dominated, with forwards running amok, defenders pushing up and Grimesy actually trapping some passes. Macca tapped in his second goal at the 53rd minute, we kept the press and denied them to the end. As Leaky says, clean sheet, job done,3-nil and prepare for tomorrow. 

At the post match presentation, the Vics awarded the best player award to Mark Lyons. No-one knew who this was until Clary stepped forward to accept his towel. Well played. 

The recovery pool session was dominated by Squizzy in his European style bathers, eight blokes trying to fit into a three person spa and wondering why there was no water left after the first tidal wave and the traditional passing of the “I don’t think we area in Kansas anymore, Toto” pink heals from Squizzy to Chiso. 

Result: WA 3 – VIC 0 

Goal scorers: Westie 1, Macca 2

WA vs NSW - Saturday, October 4, 2014

Second game of the tournament and a rematch of last year’s O45 grand final. We were hoping to change the result from the 1-7 drubbing with a different team and better plan. This worked really well in the first half. We conceded only one short corner but gained only one. Neither were successful scoring opportunities. Burger’s honesty and good sportsmanship in owning up to deflection over the baseline provide some good karma when their attack failed to penetrate from the resulting long corner. We had some chances in the first half but our forwards were impatient at times instead of working the ball in. The half court press effectively blocked almost all of the NSW attacks. Nil-nil half time. 

The second half was similar to the first until 16 minutes to go when undisciplined/unfortunate play led to us only having nine players on the field. They rebounded from one of our attacks to overlap and find a loose man at the top left of the circle. The goal was scored with a mild push past the keeper. Ten minutes later an incoming overhead on the right that bounced between Sloth and over Beaz’s head was luckily picked up by one of their lurking forwards who despite being channelled was still able to send the ball across the goal line. 

There was a frantic last six minutes where we had some more opportunities. Suck was chainsawed by four players but still could not draw the short corner. Westie took one for the team on the attacking 25 but play was stopped to allow him and the NSW defence to recover. No more score and final result 0-2. The brains trust were happier that we were able to play very good, strong hockey in the first half but disturbed by the perceived lack of discipline towards the end. The fines master will be licking his lips – green cards to Chiso, Simsy, two to Grimesy and a yellow to the new kid on the block turned bad Westie.  

New South Wales gave the best player award to Suck and commented that they were not sure if he still had any legs left. Westie’s efforts today earned him the inglorious heals. These will be uncomfortable for whoever has to wear them to tomorrow night’s team dinner. 

Result: WA 0 – NSW 2 

WA vs QLD - Sunday, October 5, 2014

After watching our inspirational juniors (O40s) flog NSW yesterday and getting over the trauma of Grimesy dropping and spilling the lolly box at half time, we were fired up for our game against Queensland. The brains trust had a new(old) plan – full press and hammer the first five minutes. It seemed to work well. Wildy slotted a short corner into the bottom right corner and we were one up.  
We dominated play through the midfield with Burger, Stealth and Scotty pushing up and providing good support for the forwards. New kid turned bad boy turned good again Westy collected one of the many assists from Chiso and Squizzy to slot in goal number two. We maintained the pressure and were rewarded with goal number three when Clarry scrambled one over the line. We conceded only one short corner. Leaky made a great save and followed up on the rebound to keep the score sheet clean. Beaz fired a rocket on our final short corner for the half that just missed the left post. Unfortunately, we had not tightened the discipline from yesterday with green cards to Scotty, Macca and a yellow to Mano for an illegal trap above his shoulder from a bouncing ball. Half time three nil. 

The second half was played in very wind conditions. We created as many opportunities as the first but were unlucky not to score. Macca missed two shots that would normally fly in and we were unable to convert our two short corners. The defence held strong only to be interrupted by Chiso who drifted into the defensive D as cover defence because we were a player down (yet again) only to cough up a short corner. The corner was well defended and Chiso was given directions as to which D he should really be in. The umpire also agreed and gave him a green card two minutes later for some undisciplined play. We continued to run and find the angles but could not find the net again. Final score was 3-0. 

Queensland awarded best player to Suck. No chainsaws today but still has not won a toss yet. We had the standard cool down with Mano in his tracksuit top (shame, shame, shame) and out for the team dinner. Westy pulled the surprise packet by not only awarding the Heals to Simsy but including the addition of a pink Roxy handbag that he pinched from his daughter. Rest day tomorrow. 

Result: WA 3 - QLD 0 

Goal scorers: Wilson, Lyons, West 
Cards: 

WA vs WAC - Tuesday, October 7, 2014

The classic grudge match derby. As is explained to all newcomers to the team this is one game that is always hard and a win is almost as good as winning a grand final. The brains trust decided not to change the winning formula. Hit’em hard, high and early. Fortunately we had the manpower to do this today. The umbillical twins, Squizzy and Chiso, fought hard and were rewarded when Macca tapped in for a classic left wing goal. Not to be outdone, three minutes later, Macca himself trapped the ball on the left baseline, performed a perfect pirouette and coolly slotted the ball past the keeper for number two. Flying under the radar for the tournament so far, Stevie was shifted to right half in what was another master stroke of the brains trust – two overlapping runs – the first resulted in a short corner and the second in a baseline cross for Westy to tap in for number three. Scotty stepped up and played a commanding role at centre half and play was directed left and right at will. 
We dominated the first half. Eric made a great save low, down to his right to prevent any opposition score in the first half. The only blemish was a green card to Clarry. 

We maintained the intensity in the second half but despite numerous invasions into the circle we were not able to score. As Macca pointed out after the game, it does not matter if we only score three goals in the first 12 minutes if our opponents do not score any. Today was a good team effort with good positional field play and early, smart ball distribution. Discipline was much better with no one else raising the ire of the umpires for the remainder of the game. The only time we ever see happy goalkeepers are when it is a clean sheet at the end of the game – so far so good. 

The defence have almost smoothed out the interchange transitions and the forwards are linking up. After a few encouraging words from Beaz, Grimesy has found his feet in the midfield and the momentum is building. 

WA Country gave the best player award to Macca’s twin brother Paul for which Macca nonchalantly stepped up to collect it on his behalf. Unfortunately, Clarry’s dodgy legs caused him to benched on iced for the later part on the game and Simsy had no hesitation of divesting himself of the pink heals and Roxy handbag. Just lucky that Clarry’s daughter was present to take photos and Facebook the world. 

Result: WA 3 - WAC 0 

Goal scorers: West 1, McKenzie 2 
Cards: 

WA vs TAS - Wednesday, October 8, 2014

This was a crunch time in the tournament when a win would secure second position on the ladder and provide the safety net through to the finals in case of a semi-final draw. Even the best made plans sometimes go astray and alas this was not our day. We even had left dug out instead of the right which caused some confusion. 

We started the game with Clarry on the injured list despite walking around rather spritely this morning. Tasmania were noticeably short staffed. That did not stop them from gaining a short corner and a very soft goal in the first five minutes. It goes to show that a momentary lapse in the backline can have dire consequences. More importantly, it took another 10 minutes to regain composure and start playing our best. Despite peppering and fumbling in front of the goals, their custodian – The Great Wall of Tassie – saved everything. Every forward and midfielder had at least one opportunity to score but it just was not going to happen today. Nil-one half time. 

Second half started a little better but inside 10 minutes they scored a second time from some incohesive play on our backline. We rebounded but in the words of Little Richard “Keep a knockin' but you can't come in”. Our forwards and midfielders have created the most bruised goalkeeper in the competition but failed to trouble the scorers. We finally salvaged some respectability in the last minutes of the game by digging the ball out from the top right corner, rolling it around the back to the left and generated a timely short corner. Beaz scored his first goal for the round with a shot that rifled between the keeper’s legs and hit the top of the back board. 
Unfortunately this was after the final siren and there was no time to repeat. Final score was 1-2. 
Well done Tassie. 

On walking off the field, the Tasmanian player of the match commented that “unluckily, WA couldn’t win a trick today”. They showed their respect by awarding the player of the match award to one of our defenders - Stealth. Suck aptly stated, “It is very hard to score against eleven full backs”. Clarry, of course, retained the Roxy bag and Heals. 

The brains trust will search their souls (and playbooks) for the semi-final rematch against Tassie tomorrow. 

Result: WA 1 - TAS 2 

Goal scorers: Beazley 
Cards: 

Semi-Final WA vs TAS - Thursday, October 9, 2014

Today’s game would be a defining moment for the squad. Draw or lose and the tournament ends. 
Win and progress to the grand final on Saturday. The brains trust had done their homework, reviewed the videos and came up with a plan – focus on the first and last five minutes each half, half court press and roll the ball around. You have to love these guys! The mood in the dressing room was quieter than usual and the constrained nervous tension was obvious - especially Grimesy who could not find his sticks or bag from yesterday. Shudder to think of the fine that is coming. Beaz generously lent him one of his sticks without the holes in it. Where is Jinder when you need him? 

Game started and we conceded neither a short corner nor goal in the first five minutes. Phew! 
Mano shifted to the half back line, Suck was getting PVC poisoning from all the ball delivery and Wildy made the pass for Westy to score the opening goal. The umbilical twins – ‘Decoy’ Squizzy and ‘Witches Hat’ Chiso ran their rings off but did not score. The team really put the plan in action today and shut down Tassie from repeating yesterday’s performance. One-nil half time. 

The second half started with the same control. Some great right to left play resulted in a classic Macca goal that rocketed into the far side netting. Two nil and the pulse quickened. Then the Master Class happened. From the classic film, “A Field of Dreams” – “If you build it, he will come”. 
Clarry, the ghost from yesterday who could barely walk from leg injuries and the weight of the Heals around his neck and the Roxy handbag on his shoulders slotted in goal number three from a rebound skirmish in the circle. This was then followed up by a one knee on the ground, almost prostrate, lunging reverse stick shot (I am not sure if this really was a tomahawk) from just inside the circle that astounded everyone including the Tassie keeper and cruised into the bottom right corner for goal number four. At this point, we knew the game was safe. There is now a log jam at the top of the scorers’ list with Macca, Westy and Clarry all in position to take this honour – unless Simsy fulfils his promise to score a double hat-trick in the grand final. 

The best team play came ten minutes before the end where Streety, the Tassie centre half, carried the ball from the centre line to the 23 line only to be doggedly channelled, dibbed and dabbed by Squizzy. Who says forwards never back tackle! This heroic effort earned a green card but effectively stopped this forward thrust and gave the remaining defenders sufficient time to regroup and block any further attacks. Final score was four nil. Goal keepers are happy. Rest day and contemplate the grand final on Saturday against NSW. 

As the cursed Ancient Mariner with the albatross around his neck blessed the sea snakes and changed his fortunes so did Clarry divest himself of the Heals and Roxy bag to Mano for the enormous wadding bandaged onto his knees. 

          “Farewell, farewell! but this I tell 
           To thee, thou Hockey-Cripple!
           He playeth well, who loveth well 
           Both man and ball and dribble.”

          (Apologies to Coleridge)

Result: WA 4 - TAS 0 

Goal scorers: Lyons (2), West, McKenzie 
Cards: Squizzy (green) 

Final WA vs NSW - Saturday, October 11, 2014

"The measure of a champion is not how they deal with success, but how they deal with adversity," selection committee chair Robert de Castella said of Sally Pearson, Australian Athlete of the year 2014. 

Grand final rematch from 2013 but with a better plan, home ground advantage and underdog status. The game started with a full squad and the same plan as the round match – half court press, focus on the first and last five minutes and do not concede an early goal. 

A very tense first half saw the play swing from side to side and team to team without either dominating. Scoring opportunities were missed by both sides. Half time came with a nil all score line. 

Second half started in the same fashion. NSW made a high ball break away from broken play, channelled to the top of the circle and then to the outside of the right post. IFIT (in front-in touch) had deserted us.  
Despite the best efforts of the defence the ball squeezed through the narrowest of gaps between Eric’s pad and the post. One nil down and devastation loomed. 

The sun, however, always comes up every morning. With 64 and a half minutes on the game clock ticked off, a short corner variation to Suck on the right and a photo finish feathered touch by Simsy saw the black and gold shine again as the ball went in and scores were level at one all. The spectators were on the edge of their seats in anticipation of a nail biting finish. Full time rolled on and the one-one score line meant sudden death extra time. 

The first seven and a half minutes saw a short corner to NSW that was broken down and stopped. The defence was getting on top with IFIT. With 45 seconds to go in this period of extra time WA were awarded another short corner. Same variation as before but Suck’s shot cracked past the left post without a tap in. 
Change of ends and another seven and a half minutes before the one-on-one goalkeeper-striker circus would be coming into play. Maybe that secret last minute training session might come in useful. 

What followed was one of the best passages of play in the whole tournament – right players in the right positions doing the right things. Former coach of the World Cup winning English rugby union team Clive Woodward describes these as TeaCUP moments – Thinking Correctly Under Pressure. The midfield held the ball. Delivered to Suck at right inside at the 23 metre line, who dragged the ball and players to the middle then passed to Stevie overlapping at right half. Ball into the circle to Wildy surrounded by a sea of light blue shirts (the photo showed seven defenders). Sensational vision by Wildy to spot Suck strolling back into the top of the circle on the right. As they say, “Cometh the hour, cometh the man”. Suck smashed the money shot into the back of the net and it’s all over. Redemption for his earlier green cards, his only undisputed goal and the monkey is off the back. Well played New South but there can only be one winner. 
Champions WA. 

Special thanks go to the brains trust – Scotty (with his new straight to the pool room, personally autographed in gold lettering Jamie Dwyer stick), Suck, Chiso, Leaky and Macca, the muscle man Lucky Phil and whoever else worked on Clarry, Burger’s strapping tape manufacturer and the author of the YouTube videos on how to apply it. 

Thanks also Suck and Paula for providing their house, lunches, the cool down spa and pool and Archie the dog to keep all players honest. 

Finally, well done to Suck for being voted player of the tournament by his team mates and commiserations to Macca because it is going to be a long hot summer in those Heals, wig, striped stockings and oh-so-not matching handbag. Looking forward to Cairns 2015. 

Result: WA 2 – NSW 1 

Goal scorers: John Sims & Alan Dick